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Candle in the Night

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Top 10 Things NOT To Say to a Pregnant Woman

I saw a list similar to this today and disagreed with many of the things that blogger had to say, so I had to make my own list!  I did keep a few of hers, so at the bottom, I've posted the link to the article.

Many of these things are directed toward strangers.  For example, it might be okay for a close friend to ask if you're planning to breastfeed or ask to touch your belly, but NOT strangers!  Some of these things though are not even okay for your closest family member to ask!

10.  Are you going to use cloth diapers/breastfeed/wear your baby/go back to work...?
Nobody's business!  Most likely, the asker just probably just wants to bestow upon your their advice.  

9.  You look like you've dropped!
I got this one three weeks before H was born.  Do they have any idea how frustrating it is to stand looking at yourself in the mirror trying to figure out if you've dropped??  And then to realize three weeks later that you SURELY had not dropped THAT early!!  Don't say this to people.  It just gets their hopes up.  

8.  They're going to be HOW FAR apart???
Rude.  That's all I have to say.  This can be asked in two different tones.  The rude tone is the one you get most often from strangers.  And it's often followed by the next item on the list.  

7.  Good LUCK!
If this is meant genuinely, great.  Normally, it's said in a sarcastic tone.  Thank you, I know what I'm getting myself into.  I know it'll be hard (to do whatever they're wishing luck for.  This could range from having babies close together to having a natural labor to breastfeeding), but I'm up to it and I'm excited about it.  Now quit being cynical and be supportive!

6.  Are you pregnant?
If there's any question in your mind, you probably shouldn't be asking.  

5.  Can I touch your belly?
For those of us who have a hard time saying no, this is a horrid question.  The worst part is, most people don't even ask.  They just do.  Just because my belly is swollen with a baby inside doesn't mean it's not still my belly.  For me, belly touching is a family and close friends affair only!

4.  You're STILL pregnant??
Yes, yes I am.  And I probably will be forever.  Whether you're over your due date by one day or by twenty days, this question is uncalled for.  If I'm still this fat, yes, I am still pregnant.  I just have to share, I was shopping at Walmart on my due date and the cashier (a college-aged guy) ask when I was due.  I said, "today" and he responded with, "SHOULDN'T YOU BE AT THE HOSPITAL????"  It was very funny to me, but really people, be informed.  Many women go over their "due date" and it is not a big deal.  

3.  You look like you're about to EXPLODE!
Thank you very much.  Pregnant women in general know they look huge and really don't need those around them to tell them so.  They also don't need horror stories about how so-and-so's water exploded all over the floor of the supermarket.  

2.  You don't even look pregnant!
This one is even better than the previous.  Thanks.  If I don't look pregnant, what do I look like?  Like I've just gained weight??  I know I'm bigger than normal and I've gained 20 lbs, so if it doesn't look like I'm pregnant, I must just look fat!

1.  My sister had a miscarriage last week.
This is the number one worst thing.  When people share their horror stories.  Pregnant mommies do a good enough job worrying about miscarriages, stillbirths, and all the other awful things.  We don't need to hear your horror stories.  
H, her Daddy, and her Pregnant Mommy on her first birthday.  

Dumb Things People Say To Pregnant Women



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