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Candle in the Night

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Dear Girls (My Response to FYI if you're a teenage girl)

Dear Girls,

Over the past couple days, you may have read a letter written to you by one, Mrs. Hall.  I read it too and I must admit, as a woman with two small children in the house who is not yet a mother of teenagers, but also hasn't been a teenager for quite some time, I quite agreed with Mrs. Hall.  I thought it was great that she was protecting her sons from the visual stimulation of scantily-clad girls out there posting pictures for their enjoyment.  I thought it was great that the Hall family looks at their Facebook feeds together.  I thought it was fantastic that she was encouraging you girls to rethink how you present yourself in public.

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But then I read this paragraph.  "And so, in our house, there are no second chances, ladies.  If you want to stay friendly with the Hall men, you'll have to keep your clothes on, and your posts decent.  If you try to post a sexy selfie, or an inappropriate YouTube video - even once - you'll be booted off our on-line island."  And honestly, I think she's fine in doing that as well.  It's up to each mother to decide how to best parent her child and this is the choice she's made for herself.  

But girls, let me tell you this.  God isn't the same as Mrs. Hall.  In fact, I'm done talking about her and what her boys think of you because although it's important, it's not as important as what God thinks.  When he sees those pictures of you...the one where you're wrapped in only a towel, or the one in your sexy pj's, or the one with the sensual pout, he weeps.  His heart is breaking.

I know the feeling.  You post a "hot" picture of yourself and you get comments.  Lots of comments.  "Girl, you are so dang gorgeous!"  "Soooooo HOT!"  "Love this!  You're so pretty!"  "Gorgeous as always!"  It's great!  You're loved. You have friends.  You're pretty.  You have value.  

But wait.  No you don't.

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And you know when you'll realize it?  When you fail at something.  When you gain weight or have a bad hair day or aren't as pretty.  When, even though everyone is cheering for you, you still feel worthless.  You'll be depressed and hurt and sad and you'll wonder why?  Why if everyone still likes you do you feel this way?  Or what can you do to get that feeling back?

How can I find my worth?  

There's only one answer to that question.  You won't find it on Facebook.  You won't find it in accomplishing things.  You won't find it in the number of friends you have or how many people you help or how talented you are.  There's only one place to find it.

Cross, Sunset, Holy Island, Northumberland
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Without the cross, we are nothing, girls.  We are worthless.  But He died for you and that gives you worth.  Nothing can change that and all you need to do is accept it.  Let Him come in and take over your heart and you'll never have to try to gain anyone's affection again because His affection is all you need and there is more than enough of it to go around.  

So please, stop looking for your worth in other places.  Stop putting your bodies out there for men to view as objects.  You're not an object.  You're beautiful to Him.  You're special to Him.  You're important to Him.  

He loves you so much, so please, don't break his heart by looking elsewhere for something that only He can give.

Love to you,


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At September 5, 2013 at 5:49 PM , Blogger Renata said...

This is an excellent post Jessica. Thanks for sharing!

At September 5, 2013 at 10:14 PM , Blogger Lizzy Grae said...

Amen!! Well said!

At September 5, 2013 at 10:19 PM , Blogger Jessica said...

Thank you for visiting, Renata! :)

At September 5, 2013 at 10:19 PM , Blogger Jessica said...

Thank you. :)

At September 5, 2013 at 10:23 PM , Blogger Jacqueline said...

I LOVE this! It is the truth that God's heart is breaking and so His plan a long, long time ago was to send Jesus. John 3:16! Beautifully written and sensitive to the needs of hurting girls (and guys) everywhere. Thank you.

At September 5, 2013 at 10:25 PM , Blogger Jessica said...

Thank you, Jacqueline. :)

At September 5, 2013 at 11:44 PM , Blogger Ceil said...

Hi Jessica! I am coming over from Fellowship Fridays.

I love your tone, the writing, the conclusion. Just wonderful! You are so right about the Facebook thing. So many times I see posts and wonder why they are saying these things? I'm sure it's just to get some recognition. You set us all on the right road by reminding us we need to remember who is leading us.
Great post! Nice to meet you today :)

At September 6, 2013 at 7:55 AM , Blogger Jessica said...

Nice to meet you too, Ceil!

You know, I think many times, girls don't even realize the reason behind posting the pictures. They see their friends do it, they do it too, and the response they get feels good, so they keep doing it. Either way, knowingly or not, it takes them down the wrong path. :(

At September 7, 2013 at 12:25 PM , Anonymous Carica said...

Without the cross, we are nothing. Wonderfully said and absolutely true. What a wonderful post for teenage girls everywhere. This is my prayer for my baby girl, to always keep Jesus first and the cross before her.


At September 11, 2013 at 7:42 AM , Blogger Rita said...

Thanks for this wonderful post. Our God is God who gives second changes. Also to our 'lost childs'.

At September 11, 2013 at 2:45 PM , Blogger stephanie harrison said...

I completely agreed with Mrs. Hall and applaud her for looking out for her sons. But thank you so much for reminding all those young ladies out there who has made a mistake it is never too late for change, and God never stops forgiving and cleaning up our messes! New follower here!~

At September 11, 2013 at 2:57 PM , Blogger Jessica said...

That is my prayer for my girls as well. Thank you for coming by.

At September 11, 2013 at 2:57 PM , Blogger Jessica said...

Yes, He is. And I'm so grateful that he allows us to start fresh every moment.

At September 11, 2013 at 2:59 PM , Blogger Jessica said...

Welcome, Stephanie! Yes, it was easy for me to just look from the standpoint of "Mom" and say she was right, but it's also so important for girls to know that our God is a God of second (and third and fourth...) chances.


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