The Blessing of the Binkie

Binkies are controversial, I know.  Some take as strong a stance on binkies as they do breastfeeding or co-sleeping, but I have to say, I'm a huge fan of the binkie.  H started taking one at five months and it was a life saver.  She quit screaming on car rides and started falling back to sleep easily when she'd wake up at night.  She easily weaned from it for daytime use and we still let her have it at nighttime and naps and aren't too concerned about making her give it up.  We know it'll be tough when that time comes, but we'll get through it.

M also didn't take a binkie for the first four months of life, but in the past three days, she's taken one and loves  it.  Again, our car rides have been much more enjoyable and she's been able to fall asleep much more easily.  But it's even more of a blessing for M.

M has always been a fussy nurser.  If you've never had a fussy nurser, you might wonder what I'm talking about.  Well, it's pretty self-explanatory.  While M nurses, she fusses.  She acts like the milk is sour or hurting her tummy or something.  She pulls, twists, and squirms at the breast.  Nursing is almost never enjoyable.  It's improved since I've cut back on dairy, but it's nearly impossible for me to never have dairy (I love a nice tall glass of milk!), so there are still bad feedings.  Even her good feedings aren't like H's good feedings were.  She just doesn't relax.  She only falls asleep at the breast after a good, hard fight.  I'm constantly having to hold her tight so she doesn't pull off and tear me to shreds.  Nursing just isn't her thing.  I've accepted this and am stubborn (and cheap) enough that I am not going to switch to formula.  I wanted to nurse her to at least 18 months and plan to do so if she doesn't self-wean first.  But I will confess, I look forward to weaning her.  I can't wait for this hard phase to be over.

So what does all that have to do with the binkie?  This morning, M woke up at 5:00.  I went in, nursed her, and after she bit me three times (the biting is a new thing), I gave her her binkie and laid her in her crib.  Well, she tossed and turned and fussed and didn't seem to be able to fall back to sleep.  She lost the binkie at some point and wasn't happy about that either.  After about 15 minutes, she was starting to get pretty worked up, so I went over and scooped her up.  I gave her the binkie back and decided to just rock with her for a few minutes.  As I was holding her and she was sucking on her binkie, she did something she's rarely done since birth.  She snuggled down in my arms and just watched me until she fell asleep.  No fighting.  No squirming.  Just snuggles.

It does a mama's heart good to snuggle with her baby and I am so glad she finally has something that helps her relax so we can do that!